Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Things You Discover When You Start Working Out Again

So, this morning, I woke up at 4:30 a.m. and met a girlfriend at the gym for a crazy ass cardio/boot camp class.  Upon her recommendation and urging, I decided to give it a go.  I've trained before, so really, how hard could this be?

To demonstrate the insanity of my experience in the wee hours of the morning, I've compiled a list of things I discovered about my out-of-shape self...maybe you can relate.

  1. Burpies, Squats, Mountain Climbers, Jumping Rope, Push ups, Planks & Running-all in one setting over multiple reps hurts alot...and that is why I curse.  I curse a lot.
  2. My ass needs some new underwear.  I'm not going to lie to you.  There just really is nothing worse than your old granny pants creeping and creating an extra fat crease in your ass.  I mean it's bad enough to have a double chin, no one needs a double dimple derriere.
  3. Just when you think that the hottie instructor must be 22, right out of college and without children...you learn that she's over 40 and has 5 kids.  WTF?  Oh Lord, how did I get to this place?
  4. Everything is better with Friends!  Just when I thought that I would throw the towel in and crawl my sad self home, I looked over at my friends and reconsidered and I'm so glad that I did.
  5. I used to think that "modification" was for sissies.  You know, those overweight, middle-aged, mothers who can't hack it.  Until I realized that was me.  Modification equals survival.  No need to apologize.
  6. Sometimes, half the battle is just showing up and trusting that some good will come.
  7. But with all that, let me assure you, it still hurts like a bitch...even hours later.
Wish me luck.

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