As I look at my watch, I'm 36 hours away from standing in line to join my pace group at my first marathon.
I've got to admit, I'm coming a little bit unglued. No one tells you that the psychological work-up is seemingly ten times worse than the running.
So, throughout the week, I have been eternally grateful for every text, email, Facebook message, yard sign, flower bouquet, card, smile, hug, picture, and word of encouragement that so many of my dear friends and family have shared. And I will take it with me every step, every mile, every part of my 26.2 mile sojourn.
But there's one tribute, that brought me to my knees. A sweet friend created a chronicle of my journey...she literally retraced my steps through blog posts, Facebook updates, and compiled what for me is amazing...
Saturday, December 24, 2011
"This morning marked a milestone. I ran my first mile without walking and at a decent clip to boot."
Tuesday, January 22, 2012
"I thought I would cry when it was done. But instead, I felt elated. Hugely elated. I did it. Five miles.I accomplished something that I truly did not think that I could. I was over the moon."
Sunday, May 6, 2012 (First Half Marathon)
"If you haven't gone for one thing in your life that feels impossible...do it. The feeling will be indescribable and you will know forever that unbelievable strength lies in you."
Thursday, June 27, 2013
"And so, next May 2014, my plan is to run the Lincoln Marathon and my prayer is that I'm not that woman who lost control of her bowels and crapped herself...because really, I have enough troubles with poop at my abode."
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
"You only live when you feel like dying. And just when it felt like I couldn't make another lap around the bend, my heart took me where my feet didn't want to go and suddenly, a cold, sunshiny day in January reminded me that I am alive and all is well."
Saturday, March 15, 2014
"Quit being such a pussy. You've done harder. You've come this far. You're not going back now. This day...this run...this experience is yours and this train is going 18 miles. Get your ass on board...now."
Sunday, April 13, 2014
"As hell bent as I am in my life to thrive and to accomplish, it was in that moment that I recognized that failure has more often served me than success. The lessons I have learned when I'm on the ground writhing in pain, humiliated, fearful, regretful, angry, and frustrated have always stuck with me. And the greatest lesson has always been to get back up again."
So, as you can see...my journey has definitely not been all roses, but certainly not all lemons either. It has been nerve wracking, exhausting, exhilarating, fraught with multiple injuries, trying, amazing and done.
I stand at the precipice of it all with feelings of fear, doubt, hope and excitement...my day is moments away and only time will tell what the end of the journey will look like.
But what I do know is that no matter what I look like, feel like or even whether or not I cross the finish line...I showed up. I put the time in. I tried. And, well, at the end of the day, that's all we can do.
Here's to embracing the mantra...