Ode to Sam on Your 21st Birthday

February 8, 2026

My Dearest Sam,

Happy, Happy 21st Birthday!!

I can hardly believe that you're 21-years old AND studying abroad in Copenhagen AND that I'm not the only blogger in the family!  It's been amazing keeping track of all of your incredible adventures through the eyes of your camera and masterful writing.

It reminds me of when I was your age studying in Greece and Turkey.

Aw man, Sam, there are so many things I want to share with you, but in a weird way, I feel like as you've grown and gone away to college, that I've really lucked out and been able to have many meaningful, beautiful conversations with you--particularly when you were home for a month before heading to Europe.

Often, we grabbed hats, gloves, and all of the big questions we could muster and made multiple loops around Elmwood Park sharing stories, getting into the weeds, picking up acorns (to remind us of our potential) and wrestling with the unanswerable.  I think I've kind of been waiting for this closeness in our relationship.  It's the gift of a lifetime to journey and to learn from and with you.

Over the years, people would tell dad and me that you remind them of an old soul and that your focus on the things that matter and your loyalty to your friends and family is unparalleled.  So, while I would love to offer you pieces of advise or words of wisdom--it's hard to encourage you to do anything differently, because you've got such a north star guiding you that it's both inspiring and comforting.

The one thing that fifty years of life does bring is the gradual understanding that the questions are infinitely more interesting and more true than the answers.  This is why when you declared studio art and philosophy as your majors I was thrilled beyond measure.  I knew you'd be reading the good thinkers and asking the hard questions as you examined what it means to live a good life.  

I'm not very good at it, but I'm learning that getting comfortable with uncertainty and not knowing is the mark of peace.  And that following your heart/gut/intuition/longing/yearning/curiosity/wonderment/hope/despair/concern/belief will never steer you wrong.  The danger lies in doing what you think the world wants you to do to prove your worth or your value.

So, let me say it now--no matter where you go, who you meet, what you study, where you work, who you love--you are a child of God with a purpose and a free will and a big, beautiful, wild, unique, precious life...so, live, really, live fully into it knowing that it doesn't have to look like anyone else's except for yours.  And that is the tricky part--because the world won't always understand or even condone your choices--they'll tell you that smart people do this or pragmatic people do that or strategic people work here or successful people look like this or love like that.  Fuck them.  

Stand up straight.  Walk into the rooms.  Be brave.  Tell your story. Share your dreams and don't be afraid to be the only one listening. 

And as you grapple with internships in other states, graduate school or jobs, relationships and what is meant to be--trust that if you remain open and let your voice be the loudest, you'll know when it's time to throw yourself at something or to pivot gracefully and move toward something else.  And as you do so, keep taking your cameras and journals with you-document it all.  Remind yourself of the incredible architecture, the extraordinary food, the loud, beautiful, kind people, bike riding and metro hopping and all of the culinary meals with newfound friends from across the globe, and say to yourself--this life, my life--isn't always easy, but it's really, really good.

Here's to so many blessings and adventures in this 21st year and may all of your memories bring you back to your 2026 mantra of wild independence.  

I could not love you more,

xoxo, Mom

 

Ode to Claire on Your 15th Birthday

My Dearest Claire Bear,

Happy, Happy 15th Birthday!

What an incredible year you've had--chock full of so many milestones--8th grade graduation from SMM, beginning of high school at Duchesne, and now both of your siblings away at college.

This is the first time in your life that it's just been you, dad and me at home without Sam and Kate.

Many days, I think of you like this...

And then, other days, I think of you like this...

You are this unique, brilliant amalgamation of wickedly intelligent, incredibly kind, stunningly beautiful, utterly precocious, unGodly persistent, feistily creative, and the strongest advocate I've met in the world. To put it simply, you cannot be pinned down.  You are a dynamic dance of it all.

This past year had you saying goodbye to a school that our family had been a part of for fifteen years--it was beautiful to watch you share your 8th grade Confirmation with Kate as your sponsor and all of our family as you graduated.

Next, you passed the baton and helped to celebrate Kate as she graduated from Duchesne and you got ready to enter as a freshman.

And during this transition, it has been absolutely incredible to witness you forge your own path.  You have immersed yourself completely with a fantastic group of friends, acted in your first play, began ringing bells in the bell choir, applied and got accepted to the Kent Bellows art fellows program at the Joslyn and have truly and completely hit the ground running.  It's been inspiring to watch and has us continually trying to catch our breath.

And, throw in that you started mowing lawns to make some nice pocket cash and found a great friend in an older woman from church who has been so kind to you.

And throughout all of it--the figuring out how to make new friends, how to manage your time, how to integrate into the challenge of high school academics, how to advocate for what you need, and how to largely do it alone without your brother and sister at your side-you have been nothing short of remarkable. An incredible force to be reckoned with.

As you belt Beastie Boys--your latest vinyl Aunt Lisa gave you--from your bedroom, I see that you are your own best you.  

You have a strong voice and you're not afraid to let the world know your perspective-particularly if you feel like there's an injustice or something/someone that needs to be reckoned with. You are powerful and stubborn and sometimes, we butt the heck out of our heads.  But the really amazing thing I've learned from you is the importance of a really good, "I'm sorry and I love you." You are quick to hug and there are no limits to your loyalty.

So, as you embark upon this new year, getting your learner's permit and taking driver's ed--while I'd love for you to slow down and let me catch my breath, I know that's not your speed.  So, let me promise you that I'm along for the ride--all of the crazy, the beautiful, the unknown, the hard, the Johnny Cash, the fantasy books, the acrylic nails, the skincare, the rockstar bangs, the treatise on teacher satisfaction, and the ways that we should all stand up to protect the underdog.

You, my Claire Bear have the world by the tail and it's such a gift to be on the journey with you.  

With wild abandon, keep being the boundless you and we'll keep loving you.

Love you so, so much,

Mom

Ode to Kate on Your 18th Birthday

July 8, 2025

My Dearest Kate,

Happy, Happy 18th Birthday!

I have so much gratitude for all of the milestones you've experienced this past year and all of the joy we've had watching you grow.

From the time you were little, you were two parts deep interest and extraordinary creativity.

You were constantly on the look out for what you could repurpose, stitch, draw, build and create.  You were deeply interested in reading about complex characters in magical story books and then deciding how you could make them come to life through 3-D printing, sewing, costuming and dreaming.  There hasn't been a season of your life when you haven't been bringing beauty, awe, and imagination into the world--it's been a through line for as long as I can remember.

In your senior year at Duchesne, you had the wonderful opportunity to create costumes for Sleepy Hollow and Seusical the Musical.  And through the Kent Bellows program, you designed, sewed, modeled and won student designer at Omaha Fashion Week.

 

And when you're not designing and sewing, you're trying to see as many productions as possible.  Hades Town was so much fun to share with Claire.

Life this past year was full applying to colleges, taking campus visits, learning about the selection process, and ultimately deciding on a really beautiful fit for you--a BFA in Theater Tech and Design and double major in Spanish at Nebraska Wesleyan--which we are selfishly grateful for the proximity so that we can see all eight main stage performances a year-hopefully many of which you'll be costuming for.

And as we watched you celebrate your final prom, scholarships, Claire's Confirmation (thank you for being her sponsor), Claire's 8th grade graduation and your high school graduation, dad and I realize that time flies when you're loving living life with your children.

And the hardest part is hoping that we've told you as much as possible how much we love you and how we're always rooting for your passions and pursuits.

In a few short weeks (although I'm hoping to sink deeply into them for as long as I can), we'll be moving you into your dorm.  We've got the linens, fridge, shower caddy, toiletries, and of course espresso maker.  And the truth is most days, I can't imagine it. I will miss you so much.  But I know that you are ready for this new journey and this wild, brave, beautiful adventure.

So, as you embark upon this year, with a new campus home, a roommate, professors, friends and a job--please remember this--you are remarkable.  There has never been another human being like you. And while it can feel tempting to forget the strength of your roots,  the dance is to explore, to question, to wander and to wonder but always to know that you're never alone--and that likely what you thought was best, right, or most true for you is what you first felt in your gut before you second guessed it.

Trust in yourself.  You have a deep wisdom and a strong North Star.  You have inside of you all that you need to make a difference in the world and to share your gifts with those you encounter.  Don't be afraid to show them who you are and to be open to learning different perspectives, ideas, and to challenge and be challenged.  This is what college is for.  These are the breeding grounds for dialogue, communion, hope and connection.

And along the way, if you feel unsure, tired, or in need of a reminder, I'm here, available on your terms, always.  I can listen.  I can give you my hug, my renewed hope, my receptacle of "what the fuck's/are you kidding me's," and my encouragement to try again.  

So, when you wonder if it's going to be okay or you think you're a little too stretched or are really over the moon, wildly ecstatic--I'm there and along with Dad, Sam, and Claire, we are holding you up, trusting in the promise of you, Cat-Uh-Lone-A...go make something beautiful!

All my love, Mom