Ode to Sam on Your 20th Birthday

February 8, 2025

My Dearest Sam,

The sun is shining brightly, the wind is blowing gently, the sky is really blue, and you are officially 20.

I stand in amazement.  No longer a teenager, no longer primarily living at home in Nebraska; you have carved out a really magnificent space at St. Olaf College in Minnesota--with kind, smart, funny friends that you host a radio program with, engage great conversation, share fabulous banter, extend generous support, and have loads of fun with. 

You've explored really cool rigorous classes that have piqued your curiosity--some of my favorites have been the enduring questions program, studio art/photography and philosophy classes as well as your business concentration that has helped me with my own small business acumen.

And now, you're waiting to see which study abroad program will have you in another country next year. 

This year, also saw you voting in your first presidential election, ushering at your first cousin's wedding, getting your wisdom teeth extracted, and traveling with a good friend maintaining childhood friendships.

And through it all, you have been Sam.  The same amazing old soul, North Star, salt of the Earth, minimalist, witty, funny, stubborn, loving, kind hearted, beautiful, generous human being.

This year, I turn 50.  And as I reflect back upon you, the person who made me a mother for the first time, I think, how did I get to be so lucky--to have a child who teaches me the things in life that really matter, who has no interest in the material and deep curiosity for an intriguing story, a funny joke, or a really good piece of music.  That when asked what he wants will say, how about a good meal and conversation?  When asked if he's afraid of what comes next says, why would I be--look at how things have turned out up to this point.  When pressed on his faith, retorts quietly that God has been good.  

So, as you embark upon this new decade, may you trust in the exploration and lean deeply into the questions believing that the answers will emerge, or maybe they won't, but we don't have to know where it will all lead to share in a good life.  Trust your internal compass.  You are a really good judge of character.  When in doubt, give it a go--trusting that you can always course correct, believing that life is for the living.  And if you need a safe space to land, I am always, always here--for a warm meal and good conversation.

Thank you for letting me be your mom and for being such a great son.  I have no words, even as I type this, to say how grateful I am for two decades of birthday celebrations with you.  You are my heart.  You are my hope.  And you have my enduring support in anything you pursue and whomever you love.

As you celebrate today with friends on campus, know that we're here at home so grateful you were born.

So much love, always,

Mom

Ode to Claire on Your Golden 14th Birthday

My Dearest Claire:

Happy, Happy Golden 14th Birthday!

I don't even know where to begin?  You, my youngest, fierce, bold, bright, loyal, tenacious amazing young woman--Happy, Happy Birthday, Sweetheart.

****

How did we get here?  Weren't you just teaching us how to climb the Monkey Bars at Washington School?

And running through the park with your big brother and sister?

And hanging out with Aunt Lisa?

And Grandma Bonnie?

And making funny faces with me?

The truth is, you're growing up faster than any of us realized, and are quickly becoming an unbelievable force to be reckoned with--which makes my heart swell and my imagination go wild with all of the possibilities of what's in store for our Claire Bear.

*****

This eighth grade year has brought some really great fun.  You kicked off the summer by heading to Washington DC with your classmates to see monuments, the White House, Arlington National Cemetery, Gettysburg and so much more.  It was a trip to remember for certain.

Followed by one of your favorite spots on earth...Kitaki...practicing archery and all of the leadership skills that make camp and the incredible human beings that participate a magical, sacred space to be for a week.

And then, the AJR concert where you sang your head off and reminded us of the power of sticking to your craft, writing lyrics that speak to your soul, and making the most of the moment.

And now, 8th grade...you're back on the Student Council, competing with the Quiz Bowl team, serving mass, continuing piano lessons, enjoying Book Bowl practices, preparing to take the high school entrance exam, getting ready to start the Speech team and with every spare moment crocheting the heck out of anything you can get your hands on both for clothing and for awesome gifts for your friends.

As I watch you move through the world, I'm struck at how thoughtful, intentional and aware you are of how things should be and why....you are an advocate for anyone who is in need and you're constantly asking how things can change for the good and what you can do to be a part of the transformation.

You are stubborn just like your dad and when the two of you get attached to an idea, it is hard to get either of you to back down.  But underneath the fierce feist is a person who is guided by a North Star that is like no other--and it is not only admirable, it is inspirational.  You make each of us want to be a better person, right after we want to kill you for arguing the point to death :)

Beyond your brilliant mind and courageous heart is a creativity and drive toward the beautiful that is unmatched.  It has been so fun to watch you crochet bags, animals, blankets, beanies, science and history projects and a million other amazing choices for the world.

And so, as you embark upon the next chapter, please know that we're all rooting for you and are excited for your upcoming Confirmation, 8th grade graduation, entry into Duchesne Sacred Heart high school, and  maybe to your chagrin, being with you for all four years of high school while Sam and Kate are in college.

You make us laugh, scream, pull our hair out, dance with joy, and remember that life is for the living.  From all of us to you, Happy Golden Birthday, Claire Bear!  We love you.

 

All my love, Mom 

Ode to Kate on Your 17th Birthday

 July 8, 2024

My Dearest Kate:

Happy, Happy 17th Birthday!

You woke up this morning, and while the world changed for me (how can you really be 17?!!), you ate a bagel, grabbed your clothes, and headed out the door to your job as a barista.  Time to make the doughnuts.

You have always been a person that gets the job done-quietly, intentionally and consistently.

This past year has been such a marvel to watch your choices.  You made the hard but good decision to release dance to make time for costume design for Duchesne's productions of Annie and a Midsummer Nights Dream along with Kent Bellow's mentorship program.  Seeing your creations come to life in fashion, Cosplay, 3-D art, painting, embroidery, and even in Madrid as you created ceramic art is so inspiring.

Speaking of Spain, it was so much fun when you came home to listen to your stories of castles, museums, food, fashion, art, history....and...to receive all of your texts in Spanish.  It seems as though this will be the first of many stamps on your passport and that you found the hunger to see more of the world.

And, of course, this has been an amazingly liberating year of driving--to school, to work, to have dinner with friends, to grab late night Sonic and to feel the freedom of going where you want to go with the ability to do so.  Thank you for carpooling your little sister around, grabbing stuff for us at the grocery store and for taking your time on the road. 

And now, here we are, inches away from senior year.  A final year at Duchesne with lots of hard, good classes, a final semester to build your portfolio, the last musical and play costume curations, and of course, big decisions about where to apply to college and what makes good sense.  And, as you embark upon all of this, and the seemingly endless conversations we've had as a family about them, I want you to remember a few things...you've always been a maker...

And a reader...

And a dancer...

And a sewer...

And because all of these amazing parts are inside of you, you don't have to worry about losing them or accentuating one over the other.  Instead, trust that you will always be a maker--no matter what you study in college, or where you go, or who you meet, or which classes you take, or what your degree says.  You were born to make beauty.

So, as we do this senior year/college thing together, I promise to stand by your side, and love you as it all unfolds--no matter how it unfolds.  And when you're unsure, I'll be here with really good coffee and a bear hug--because in the end, it's not what you major in, what your business card says, the street you live on, or the amount of money you make-it's about how you treat others, the ways you remain curious and interested in the world, and the opportunities you take, imperfectly, to manifest your joy, your color, your idea, your hope into the world.  And knowing that, I'm not worried one bit. 

You are the greatest gift, and our family is so blessed to have your humor, your wit, your love, and your light.  Keep shining in your weird, unique, beautiful, only you way, and we'll keep basking in the beauty.

All my love, always,

Mom